Tyler Clementi's Suicide Must Be A Teachable Moment on Homophobia

Dear readers: I wrote this letter this morning to the Today Show, who ignored the reason behind Tyler Clementi's suicide, concentrating only on Internet bullying. Please consider writing them as well at Today@nbcuni.com And please talk to your children! Tell them nothing is worth taking their life over, that you love them, and that sexual diversity is part of God's gift to us. PLEASE.

Dear Today,

Your piece on Tyler Clementi's suicide focused almost exclusively on the dangers of webcams and internet posting, rather than addressing what drove Tyler to take his life.

If Tyler had been kissing a girl, this tape wouldn't have been made. If made, it wouldn't have been twittered and posted.

But, he wasn't. He was kissing another boy, and even in today's world, that made him the subject of ridicule and hate. And his shame at being outed drove him to end his life.

Homophobia and hate caused his death, and you inadvertently add to the problem when you don't even mention it.

Tyler's death is one of five gay teens and young adults in the last few weeks. Can we count on you for a segment on gay teen suicide? Can we count on you to get the word out about GLSEN, or It Gets Better, or the Trevor Helpline?

Let's make sure that Tyler didn't die in vain. Help us make this a teachable moment for parents and teens. Please call on me if I can be of help as you prepare this segment on the real issue that is causing so many young people to take their lives -- and how parents can make sure that their children know that they are loved and accepted without regard to their sexual orientation or gender identity.

The Reverend Debra W. Haffner

Ending Eugenics for Sexual Orientation Before It Begins

You may have seen the article in Newsweek about using medications in utero to decrease the likelihood that a girl fetus will be born a lesbian or reject tightly prescribed female sex roles.

The article behind the article was developed by the Hastings Center and you can read it here: http://www.thehastingscenter.org/Bioethicsforum/Post.aspx?id=4754&blogid=140

My reaction to the articles were mixed. Based on my own readings and discussions with scientists over the year, I do think that prenatal hormones and genetics play a role in both sexual orientation and gender identity. I think there is much that will be learned in the future about how much, and I support high quality, carefully reviewed, given consent for research -- apparently not what has been going on according to the Hastings Center.

However, the possibility that such research could be used for genetic engineering is appalling. I believe as a sexologist that sexual diversity is not "abnormal" but expected, and that we should support diversity not try to eliminate it. And as a minister, I believe that sexual and gender diversity is part of the blessing of God's creation. We need to name any attempt to use medications to change sexual orientation as eugenics, and work to oppose it before it even begins.

As our Open Letter on Sexual and Gender Diversity says,

"Loving, just communities embrace everyone; they are strengthened when all people are able to live fully and express their gender and sexuality with holiness and integrity. We celebrate sexual and gender diversity as a blessing that enriches all."

Raise a Faithful Voice for LGBT Pride

Rev. Haffner is on the road this week. This guest blog is by Tim Palmer, director of communications and outreach for the Religious Institute.

It's supposed to be hot and humid in New York City on Sunday, but I'll be stepping out with my fellow Episcopalians in the city's 40th annual march for LGBT Pride. The Village Voice has a terrific first-person account of the first march -- in 1970, one year after the Stonewall uprising of June 1969. Since that article isn't online, I'll direct you to Michael Musto's column instead.

Musto asks an important question: For all the progress and visibility LGBT people have achieved in popular culture, why are our civil rights still lagging behind? Here we are in Year Two of the Obama administration, and there's still no ENDA, no DADT repeal, and no mention of challenge to DOMA.

But -- unlike Years One through Eight of the previous administration -- there is reason for hope. The U.S. House of Representatives has authorized repeal of Don't Ask Don't Tell; the Senate Armed Services Committee has followed suit; and now we await action by the full Senate. ENDA -- the Employment Non-Discrimination Act -- has at least gotten a hearing or two on Capitol Hill, and some advocates remain hopeful that the bill will finally pass. (Does 89% public support count for nothing?)

No surprise that the U.S. Catholic bishops and the Southern Baptist Convention are mobilizing to forestall both of these steps toward justice. The Religious Institute offers two ways for progressive people of faith to make their voices heard.

First: If you are a member of the clergy or a religious professional, read and endorse the Open Letter to Religious Leaders on Sexual and Gender Diversity. The Open Letter makes a faith-based argument for LGBT civil rights and full inclusion in our congregations and denominations. We launched this sign-on campaign earlier in the week in the hope of getting at least 1,000 signature by Monday, June 28th -- the 41st anniversary of Stonewall. We are more than halfway there. Please add your name, and forward the invitation to your friends and colleagues.

Second: We invite all people of faith -- laity and clergy, from all traditions -- to become part of the Faithful Voices Network. The network is a multifaith, grassroots movement of people of faith who support sexual health, education and justice, including LGBT equality. Take the pledge today!

If it's too hot to join in your local Pride march, do your celebrating online. Help us raise a faithful voice for LGBT justice. And have a happy and blessed Pride.