Adults set up a fake prom in Mississippi rather than have a lesbian teen couple attend the actual prom.
A district attorney in Wisconsin threatens to charge sex educators with sex abuse if they teach condom use to teens younger than 16 in accordance with state education law.
A Vatican official on Easter Sunday suggests that the faithful avoid the "petty gossip" about sexual abuse of children and youth by priests.
These recent events reported in the news in the past few days appal me. I'm guessing they do you, too.
And what do they teach our young people? That some adults so devalue gay and lesbian youth that they shouldn't be included in important events. That some adults would rather deny young people life saving information than acknowledge that some teens engage in sexual relationships. That some adults turn their back on young people who are being sexually abused by adults.
What do I want teens (and the adults who care for them) to know? That forming a sexual identity is a developmental task of adolescents. That adults need to support the teen virgins and the teens who engage in sexual behaviors. That truth telling should be the hallmark of all of our programs. That adults will do everything they can to protect youth from abusive adults, regardless of profession. That young people have the right to ask questions and a right to have answers. That they deserve our respect and our support as they become adults.
The good news for today is that the teen birth rate went down last year, after increasing for the past two. More teens are protecting themselves, either by abstaining from PVI (penile-vaginal intercourse) or by using contraception. While the adults are fighting, they're seeking out what they need to be safe. Shouldn't we be on THEIR side?
Showing posts with label sexual abuse. Show all posts
Showing posts with label sexual abuse. Show all posts
Tuesday, April 06, 2010
Monday, September 22, 2008
Prayers for Virginia Mollenkott, Eve Ensler, and the Women in the Congo
One of the greatest blessings of my move to ministry are the people I get to know and with whom I share my ministry. There are the people I work with every day -- Kate Ott, Tim Palmer, Katey Zeh, and Rev. Steve Clapp who enrich my life and work beyond words.
And then there the people I get to meet and know in the course of my ministry.
On Friday night, I attended a celebration of the life and work of Dr. Virginia Ramey Mollenkott, the author of such groundbreaking books as "Is the Homosexual My Neighbor?" and more recently "Omnigender". Virginia has spoken out for the LGBT community and God's love of diversity for decades. Virginia self identifies as a transgender, lesbian, evangelical Christian (and some of you thought sexologist minister was an oxymoron!) In addition to her amazing decades of scholarship and activism, she has a huge generous heart. I wrote her how inspired I was by her work -- she wrote me back her admiration for our's, and told me to just keep doing it, one project at a time, just like she has.
And then Sunday morning, I received an email from Eve Ensler, who is currently on her third trip to the Democratic Republic of the Congo. Along with the UN and UNICEF, she has created a project to stop the rape of women and girls in the Congo and to support a hospital and city to repair the tens of thousand of women who have been victims of unrelenting brutal violence. This past week, the Panzi Hospital, where women are repaired daily, was attacked by bandits. You can read more in Eve's own words at http://v10.vday.org/news-alerts/ensler-update-from-goma
The Religious Institute is launching a project in the coming weeks to engage faith communities in this Congo initiative. I'll be posting more here, but we will be asking congregations of all types to hold Congo Sabbaths during the coming year, to educate themselves and to help raise money to help women rebuild their lives after rape and torture. As people of faith, we must stand up against this violence against women's very beings.
Virginia and Eve, you inspire me by your courage, your commitment, your outrageousness, your fearlessness. I hope they'll inspire you too.
And then there the people I get to meet and know in the course of my ministry.
On Friday night, I attended a celebration of the life and work of Dr. Virginia Ramey Mollenkott, the author of such groundbreaking books as "Is the Homosexual My Neighbor?" and more recently "Omnigender". Virginia has spoken out for the LGBT community and God's love of diversity for decades. Virginia self identifies as a transgender, lesbian, evangelical Christian (and some of you thought sexologist minister was an oxymoron!) In addition to her amazing decades of scholarship and activism, she has a huge generous heart. I wrote her how inspired I was by her work -- she wrote me back her admiration for our's, and told me to just keep doing it, one project at a time, just like she has.
And then Sunday morning, I received an email from Eve Ensler, who is currently on her third trip to the Democratic Republic of the Congo. Along with the UN and UNICEF, she has created a project to stop the rape of women and girls in the Congo and to support a hospital and city to repair the tens of thousand of women who have been victims of unrelenting brutal violence. This past week, the Panzi Hospital, where women are repaired daily, was attacked by bandits. You can read more in Eve's own words at http://v10.vday.org/news-alerts/ensler-update-from-goma
The Religious Institute is launching a project in the coming weeks to engage faith communities in this Congo initiative. I'll be posting more here, but we will be asking congregations of all types to hold Congo Sabbaths during the coming year, to educate themselves and to help raise money to help women rebuild their lives after rape and torture. As people of faith, we must stand up against this violence against women's very beings.
Virginia and Eve, you inspire me by your courage, your commitment, your outrageousness, your fearlessness. I hope they'll inspire you too.
Wednesday, July 18, 2007
How Much Is Silence Worth?
Well, in the case of the Vatican, apparently 660 million dollars.
That's how much it's going to cost the Roman Catholic Church to settle a case brought by 508 people who were sexually abused by priests over the past fifty years.
Think for a moment about how many people that might feed...or house...or provide health services for.
Think for a moment about how those 500 people and their wives, husbands, partners, and children have suffered.
Think how much the Vatican doesn't want Bishop Mahoney to have to testify in public about why these priests were simply moved to another parish rather than being removed from service completely...rather than being required to get help and to be held accountable.
The Vatican said on Monday that they are now committed to ending this problem. They also said in their release that other institutions have this problem as well. It reminds me of the child who says, "But everyone is doing it" when their parent discovers cigarette smoking. Perhaps the Vatican forgot that the book of Matthew tells us to take the log out of our own eye first.
I understand why each of these survivors would want a million dollars, why it would feel justified. But I can't help but think it means we'll never really know how this abuse of power and patriarchy was allowed to go on for decades...or if it has really ended now.
That's how much it's going to cost the Roman Catholic Church to settle a case brought by 508 people who were sexually abused by priests over the past fifty years.
Think for a moment about how many people that might feed...or house...or provide health services for.
Think for a moment about how those 500 people and their wives, husbands, partners, and children have suffered.
Think how much the Vatican doesn't want Bishop Mahoney to have to testify in public about why these priests were simply moved to another parish rather than being removed from service completely...rather than being required to get help and to be held accountable.
The Vatican said on Monday that they are now committed to ending this problem. They also said in their release that other institutions have this problem as well. It reminds me of the child who says, "But everyone is doing it" when their parent discovers cigarette smoking. Perhaps the Vatican forgot that the book of Matthew tells us to take the log out of our own eye first.
I understand why each of these survivors would want a million dollars, why it would feel justified. But I can't help but think it means we'll never really know how this abuse of power and patriarchy was allowed to go on for decades...or if it has really ended now.
Wednesday, March 14, 2007
Who Is Welcome In Your Congregation?
As some of my loyal readers know, I regularly assist congregations on policies and procedures to assure that children and youth are safe from sexual abuse and harassment -- both within in the congregation and at home. I am the author of a book for congregations "A Time to Heal" that addresses keeping children safe and how to potentially minister to a person with a history of sex offenses.
Today's San Diego Union includes a story of a church in California that has consulted with me about how to respond to a person on the sex offender registry list who seeks to attend their church. As a result of coming forward to the church, explaining his status, and asking for their support and an accountable structure, and the ensuing furor by some members and some parents, the man has lost his job and his home.
The story is a warning for all congregations. They did not have a safe congregations policy, they did not have procedures in place for dealing with an accused or convicted sexual offender, their congregants had not been educated about the realities of sexual abuse prevention, and so now they are in a crisis situation about what to do. They are far from alone. Almost all of the congregations who contact me for assistance around these issues have not addressed them until a KNOWN sex offender is in their midst.
Notice the word "KNOWN." Because the probability is that every congregation has members who are sexually attracted to children. The sex offender who is known to us, who is on a limited access agreement that denies him or her any contact with children but welcomes them to adult worship and education, is NOT a risk to the young people in our congregation. It is the person we don't know, the person who is sitting next to us in church or working with our children, who IS. And that's why policies for screening all volunteers who work with children, doing backround checks for all staff and employees, having a two adult in the classroom rule, providing annual sexual abuse prevention lessons to children and parents, and SO ON are so important.
Does your congregation have a written policy? What's your experience been with these issues? I hope you'll share your experience.
And if you'd like a copy of "A Time to Heal", call our publisher at 419-872-7448.
Today's San Diego Union includes a story of a church in California that has consulted with me about how to respond to a person on the sex offender registry list who seeks to attend their church. As a result of coming forward to the church, explaining his status, and asking for their support and an accountable structure, and the ensuing furor by some members and some parents, the man has lost his job and his home.
The story is a warning for all congregations. They did not have a safe congregations policy, they did not have procedures in place for dealing with an accused or convicted sexual offender, their congregants had not been educated about the realities of sexual abuse prevention, and so now they are in a crisis situation about what to do. They are far from alone. Almost all of the congregations who contact me for assistance around these issues have not addressed them until a KNOWN sex offender is in their midst.
Notice the word "KNOWN." Because the probability is that every congregation has members who are sexually attracted to children. The sex offender who is known to us, who is on a limited access agreement that denies him or her any contact with children but welcomes them to adult worship and education, is NOT a risk to the young people in our congregation. It is the person we don't know, the person who is sitting next to us in church or working with our children, who IS. And that's why policies for screening all volunteers who work with children, doing backround checks for all staff and employees, having a two adult in the classroom rule, providing annual sexual abuse prevention lessons to children and parents, and SO ON are so important.
Does your congregation have a written policy? What's your experience been with these issues? I hope you'll share your experience.
And if you'd like a copy of "A Time to Heal", call our publisher at 419-872-7448.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
